JILL RUBY-WAHBA, MA, LMFT, ATR-BC

Making art has always been my safe escape. It is where things begin to make sense, I feel clearheaded, calm and content. “It” became apparent in early March 2020, once everything shutdown, that I could not maintain my private practice and be a full- time single mom. I felt the uncertainty, fear, anxiety and overwhelm that clients in crisis so often expressed. I was on the “Corona Coaster,” it was making me sick, and I was realizing it might never stop to let me off. It upset me terribly that I could not manage my stress better, and I knew I could not help anyone until I got myself under control. I had to refer everyone out.

The idea for “Holding *It* Together” came from my desire to feel a sense of normalcy and control when everything around me was falling apart. I knew making something would help soothe my nerves and provide some clarity. This piece is about my process of adjusting to the new normal trying to find ways to keep moving forward.

Holding “It” Together
(Mixed Media, Textiles and Wood, 18” x 24”) 

This piece reflects my inner chaos, attempts to contain the chaos, and efforts to understand it. I took scraps of whatever I could find, bound them together to make something strong, balanced, supportive and flexible. The knitted piece is compact, dense and textured. It needed to be attached to something strong enough to allow the piece to be manipulated, touched, to move and shift, even if the piece could not be entirely contained within its borders.

The significance, purpose and meaning of "IT," changes daily for me. It feels confusing, more complicated, chaotic, desperate, unresolved.... just as life has felt for the past several months. Ultimately, as with the variety of weight and quality of materials used, this piece it is about my continual attempts to find balance, integrity, peace, hope and prosperity, despite all the challenges and existential threats experienced in 2020.

jrubywahbatherapy@gmail.com


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